Thursday, February 24, 2011

It's a GIRL!

I've been so absent in my blog world lately because I've been so present in my real world.  Motherless has been coming over more and more.  I have been so freaking happy it's almost sickening.  I told S the other morning that it will be "back to normal" when we have a fight.  You know - have an explosion, and then realize that we are both still there, loving each other and everything is going to be okay.  Like moms and daughters do.  This is usually over a parenting matter where one person is just trying to do what's best for the other.  S was all like, "Uh.  NO. I hate it when she is mean to you."

My wish came true.  Sorta.  I'll get to that later, read on.

S and I recently became the very proud parents of a little guinea pig girl.  We named her Josephine.  Stand by for annoying parental bragging photos:

Our baby, Josephine.

When we saw her - no, more like when we held her - we knew she was coming home with us.  S tried talking the kids into taking her home, but L had her heart set on a couple of gerbils.  So I said to S, "Let's get her and she can be our fur baby."

Look at that face.  Really.  Look.
ohmygod! S got so excited when she heard that.  This is the first time in her life that she hasn't had a pet of any kind.  To be honest, I've been ready for a pet too.  I think the house needs something here that the kids can enjoy and look forward to coming to every week.  PLUS, and this might sound totally fucking crazy and I don't give a shit... but The Baby is 3 now, and this is about the time that I start jonesing real bad for another baby.  I know... crazy shit.  S and I already decided... no babies.  So, this little Josephine, fucking perfect.

S makes fun of this picture.

She says I look like a new mother; beaming with pride and love.

I am.

Anyway, we get her home, and I cannot and will not put her in her cage.  I am so excited about my our new baby.  I want to tell Motherless.  I want Motherless to see her, hold her, love her like I do.  I know Motherless will... you see Motherless is an animal person, just like S is (*sigh*)... and Motherless had the cutest fucking guinea pig that she had to let go of not too long ago.  I can tell she grieved that loss.  It was hard for her.  I was apprehensive about how she would feel about Josephine because of the loss of her piggie.

I texted her and told her my exciting news.

What did she do?  She texted back that she was worried I was going to lose interest in a month and not take care of Josephine and she didn't want to feel responsible for that.  She also reminded me of previous pets we owned while I was married to her dad that...err... didn't go well.  Then, the proverbial cake topper was when she informed me that the kids aren't at my house enough to warrant a pet and all of their responsibilities.


I was in tears.  Not gonna lie.  And I told her so.  "That hurts."

I know the number of days my kids are here a week.  I don't need reminding... and goddamnmefortrying to create a fucking home here for them, for her too.  A place they can feel comfortable.  A place they want to come back to.

I just let it go with her.  She was parenting me and it fucking hurt, and I'll be honest, it was a little insulting.  But, I just let it go.

A few hours later, she texted that she was "secretly jealous of Josephine because she missed her guinea pig so much."  I commended her for admitting that.  And we joked around.  And she has been coming over and loving on Josephine ever since.  And loving me.  And I've been loving her.  So, we had our little fight and we all survived.  I know bigger ones will come.  I'm trying to brace myself.  I wonder though if the bigger fights will come when I am parenting her... or if she will just keep trying to parent me. 

Motherless giggling at her fur sissy.

We discovered Josephine is pregnant.  Due any day now.  Only I could pick out and fall in love with a pregnant guinea pig.  We thought she was just fat.  We loved that about her.  Her big, round, fat belly - well, that and her super messy hair.  (Did you get a look at that hair?  OMG it's a wreck!)

Her first night in our home, I was holding her and I told S... "I think I feel fetal movement in here!"  I made S feel.  Then we did our Internet research and determined that she was indeed pregnant.  Crazy.  Just crazy.

I'm convinced this is why I wanted her.  (See, now I'm the one who wanted her, not S.)  Because I wanted her to have a homebirth, surrounded by love and comfort.

 We have decided that if Josephine goes into labor and S is gone on a tip, Motherless will come to help with the delivery.  This is actually kind of funny, because "help with the delivery" should include nothing more than staying out of Josephine's way.  Pretty much what midwives do.  We are the guardians of normal, safe birth.  I will (hopefully) get to show Motherless a little bit about what midwives do... a little bit of how we "sit on our hands" and let the mamas follow their instincts, trust their bodies, and just give birth!

Midwives intervene when they need to.  If there is trouble, an emergency, something of that order.  And we will with Josephine too.  Like if one of her pups needs a face cleaning.  Or if there is a dystocia.  I actually have no idea what to do with a guinea pig dystocia, but I am pretty sure it is NOT the same thing we do with a human dystocia.

Here's a little secret for you all... even if S is here, not on a trip, I am calling Motherless to come right over.  She has got to be a part of this.

I never knew I could be this much in love with so many creatures.


RadDyke said...

Sounds like Motherless may end up with another of Josephine's babies!

Just be careful not to get too attached to the babies...seriously, do exactly what the vet says in staying away from her and from them until she's ready to let you near them. Otherwise she will kill them. Gruesome but true. With human "help" in the birth or after (including touching the babies), the mother gets all freaked out and will kill the babies...

L said...

She just may get a pup! But S and I get first pick of the litter. We want a female for Josephine to have a playmate.

Your information is not exactly accurate though about handling newborn guinea pigs. You can handle them immediately after birth... unlike other small furry little creatures... they don't kill their young after human touch.

AtYourCervix said...

Ohhhh how exciting!!!! How many babies do guinea pigs have in an average litter??

A homebirth with a apropos!

Natalie said...

I love that a guinea pig labor will be Motherless' introduction to midwifery...awesome. :) And having experienced the magic of a midwife who so gracefully sat on her hands and then moved like lightning when my wife and son were in trouble, I am awe of what you do! We had to transport, and as much as the idea of a hospital birth freaked me out, she was there standing guard every minute to make sure it went just as it was meant to (for 27 hours of labor!).

You midwives are amazing!!

RadDyke said...

Oh wow. Glad you know your shit, girl. :D Sorry to steer you wrong. We've had disasterous guinea pig baby incidents...but takes a midwife to know how to handle a home birth! :D I can't wait to see pictures of all of this!!

L said...

Just because I'm a midwife doesn't mean I know how to handle anything animal related. I'm just going by my resources. You know... the usual... world wide web... brother in law... pet store guy... and then this morning I called the vet to be sure because you freaked me out.


About your horrendous birthing incidents with guinea pigs... AFTER Josephine's birth, let's discuss those! I don't want to be worried beforehand.

@Natalie- Motherless has a little experience with midwives already because her brother was born at home, and her sister was a homebirth/hospital transfer. But, she was young, and I don't know what she got out of those experiences. Like why her mom was chosing to do things so non-mainstream...

@AYC... from what I'm reading it's like 2-7. I think I feel 2 at least... I'm hoping for 3!

Rexie said...

So damn piggly wiggly cute! Loved this post to pieces!